Child support is an issue that is being fought over in courts every day throughout the nation. It seems standard when a mother is raising a child herself, the father is expected to put forth financial aid toward the cost of raising and caring for the child. When it becomes known that a father is not paying to support his offspring, he becomes known as a “deadbeat.” There have been recent cases where biological fathers are fighting back. In a heated discussion between Mel Feit, an advocate and the current director of the National Center for Men, and Gloria Allred, the president of the Women's Equal Rights Legal Defense and Education Fund, the issue over the father’s role in supporting a child was debated. The debate stemmed from a 2009 case where a father stated he did not need to pay child support for the infant in question, because he was “forced into fatherhood.” Points presented in the discussion included the fact that a woman can deliver her child to a safe-haven or give the child up for adoption if she does not want to raise the child or does not feel suitable for motherhood, yet a father cannot deny his paternal rights in the same manor. Additionally, the time window for women to tell their partners they are pregnant was discussed. This issue was presented with a family in which the father was contacted by a former partner to inform him he had a son. This contact was established years after the son was born, and the father was asked to pay child support for the boy. Fiet and Allred debated if women should be held accountable for not informing the fathers of the pregnancy in an allotted amount of time. Further discussion and points can be found from the source at: http://drphil.com/slideshows/slideshow/4701/?id=4701&slide=0&showID=1150&preview=&versionID=
In response to this article, please answer and at least two of the following questions:
1.) Do you believe that men can be “forced” into parenthood?
2.) Is it justifiable for women to be able to surrender their rights for their children by adoption, while fathers cannot do so?
3.) Do you agree or disagree that there should be a statute of time for which a women can let the male know she is pregnant before the father can deny rights to the child?
4.) Furthermore, do you believe men should have a say in the right to their child’s life? Should they be able to have a say if they want to raise the child, but the mother plans on having an abortion?
This is a very difficult issue in which both sides of the issue are correct in different regards. I believe that the first question that discusses whether the father is “forced” into parenthood utilizes very biased wording. I think that when two partners have sex and choose not to use protection or have a child for whatever reason they both become equally responsible for the outcome of the pregnancy. If the mother chooses to have the baby, then yes, the father is most definitely responsible for caring for the child. Furthermore, by not using protection or whatever the circumstance may be, the woman is also being forced into pregnancy, so this wording using “forced” is a two-way street. In other words, it goes both ways. Both the man and the woman are being forced into situations that maybe neither of them had initially hoped for or planned on. Moreover, if women are allowed to surrender their rights for their children by adoption, then men must be granted the same right. I think one way to remedy this situation is by implementing a statute of limitations or time frame in which the impregnated woman must inform the father of her child about the pregnancy. Once the time period is up, then the father if he has not been informed, cannot and should not be held responsible for a pregnancy that he had no previous knowledge of. That being said, I do agree that there should be a statue of time for a woman to let the male know she is pregnant before the father can deny the rights to his child. Lastly, I wholeheartedly believe that men should have a say in the right to their child’s life but women will always have more clout and ultimately the final say in decisions regarding their children because they are the sex who carries the child in their wombs for 9 months. It’s difficult to take into account a man’s opinion when the pregnant woman’s opinion differs from his beliefs.
ReplyDeleteI feel as though this is slightly similar to Brianna’s blog early on that was on fatherlessness. In a way, it is showing how a father is not a part of the child’s life because they do not want to pay child support and essentially want nothing to do with the child. I do not believe men can be forced into childhood, even though it is their fault as well for the pregnancy. Just like the mother can abort or give away her child, a father can also decide whether they want to be in the child’s life or not. Decisions on what parents want to do with their child are their own decision and no one can necessarily be forced to do anything they do not want to do, even if it is the right thing. I agree that there should be a statue of time for which a women can let the male know she is pregnant before the father can deny rights to the child. Honestly if you need an extensive amount of time to figure out if you want to be in the child’s life or not clearly shows you are not ready. You need to make the decision as soon as possible because they baby is coming either way. I believe men have the right to their child’s life. If the mother was planning on having an abortion, she should at least run it by the father to get his opinions, way the pros and cons, and have each other understand their take on the situation. Women might think just because they bear the child and the mother is the most important person to the child, does not mean the father is not nearly as important or necessary as the mother.
ReplyDeleteI believe that the father of the child is most definitely responsible for his child, and forced is not at all the correct word for this. Both men and women know what can happen by having sex, so when a women gets pregnant, they both become the parents. Even if the father is not in the child’s daily life, he is just as much responsible for the child as the mother. If a woman gives up a child for adoption, the father is also giving up his rights to the child, where as if the woman keeps the child the father is still accountable. Adoption releases the child from both parents making not only the biological mother no longer responsible, but also the biological father. I believe that if the father wants to give up the child for adoption, but the mother does not agree, the father should not be held accountable for the child. If the mother needs the support of the father, but the father wants the child given up for adoption, the father should not have to give money. If both parents agreed to keep their child, and then the father leaves, he is still responsible for the child. I do agree that there should be a statute of time for which a women can tell the father she is pregnant with his child. If there is no set amount of time, a woman may wait until she is in financial crisis, which could be many years after the child is born. This is unfair to the father, because he should have known he had a child during the pregnancy.
ReplyDeleteI believe that there should be a certain statute of time when a woman should let the father know she is pregnant before the father can deny his rights. I’ve seen many television shows where the mother decides to tell the father that they had a child together ten years after it happened. In most cases I’ve seen, the mother only decides to tell the father because he has some high paying job and she has no money at all. Telling a man that he has a child ten years after it happens just isn’t fair to him and he shouldn’t have to choose to parent. In a perfect world it would be nice if he did, but he shouldn’t be forced to pay child support for a child he had no idea about until recently. There should be a statute of up to two or three years because then it may not be fair to the father to be bombarded ten years later, pay money he doesn’t have, or give his fortune away to a mother that could be using it just for her own needs. So, before this two or three years is up I believe that it is fair to find the child’s biological father and have him pay child support because it is more recently and he will be able to create a better bond with the child rather than when they’re older.
ReplyDeleteThere are justifiable points on both sides of this issue. I think it is unfair for a woman to inform the father of her child years later that he has a child, and suddenly expect child support. It seems very suspicious, and I would expect that there are some selfish undertones, like the mother would want some of the money for herself instead of for the child's well-being. Even if the two parents are not together, they still need to make mutual decisions for the sake of the child. The father definitely should have a say in whether or not the mother has an abortion. If he really wants the baby and she really does not, the father has the right to keep the baby and take care of the baby himself when he or she is born. It is just as much his baby as it is hers. However, this also stands for when the mother wants the baby. As long as the father has full knowledge that the mother is pregnant and she will be keeping the baby, he has a responsibility to support the child. Regardless of how he feels about the mother, it is his child too, and he has a direct responsibility towards him or her, as it was both parents' conscious decision to have the child.
ReplyDeleteI think a man can be "forced" into fatherhood, for lack of a better term. If he made the decision to have unprotected sex, he made the decision to deal with the consequences. In this case, the woman should have informed the father; however, the father should have also checked in with the mother of his child and could have found out about the child another way. I disagree with what Mikaela said, because that child is still half of his/her father. The father should still be held responsible no matter how much time has passed. Think about the woman involved in this case as well: she was "forced" into motherhood too, right? To answer the last question, I do believe the father has a right to decide the future of the unborn child as well. Ultimately, the child is growing inside of its mother yet it was created by both the man and the woman. I think that at abortion clinics they should have a signature of the baby's father. I understand this may be impossible to do in many circumstances. In a perfect world, this would be ideal. This blog post got me thinking, and I like that it raises many hard questions.
ReplyDeleteI believe this issue arises many points of controversy. For one, i think fathers should have an equally important say in weather or not their child should be put up for adoption. I do not think it is justifiable for women to be able to surrender their children rights and give them up for adoption while fathers cannot. I believe both partners should have equal say in the situation. They are both parents of the child and they had the child together so i think it is only fair if they both come to a consensus. On the same note, i believe that men should have a say in the right to their child's life. If the mother does not want to raise the child and wants to have an abortion, i think the father should have the right to say that he wants to raise the child. It is just as much his child as it is her child and he should have the right to be able to raise the child if he wants to.
ReplyDeleteThis is a difficult issue where all cases are not the same. Yes i believe men can be "forced" into parenthood. If a women wants a child, she will do anything in her power to get pregnant. She could lie about taking birth control pills or trick a man another way. I agreed that there should be a statue of time for which a women can let the male know she is pregnant. If a man has no idea he has a kid then how is he supposed to be held responsible for it. If a man finds out he has a 10 year old kid and the mother wants him to pay child support, I don't think he should have to pay. I believe it is the womens fault for not telling the man.
ReplyDeleteYes I think men should have a say in the right to their child's life. The child is just as much the mothers as the fathers. Just because women bare the child a father should not have any less rights to the child because without him there would not be a child.
I believe that a man can be forced into parenthood. I agree with what Leanne said because by having unprotected sex, he put himself at risk of being a father. I also think that woman is wrong in not telling the man that he is father. One parent in this case the mother should not be allowed to surrender their child to adoption. Both of the parents should have a say in the right to their child’s lifebecause they might have differing opinions. I agree that there should be a statute of time for which a women can let the male know she is pregnant before the father can deny rights to the child because then she could ask for child support in the future because of his job. The woman would most likely want the money for herself not for the child. To answer the last question, I absolutely believe that the father should have a say in the right to their child’s life. They both have equal rights to the child and its not fair for only one to make decisions for the child. Having kids can change people's lives and it is one of the most beautiful things we have.
ReplyDeleteThis is a great issue, and I've never really thought about it before. I do believe that some fathers feel "forced" into parenthood. Mothers can give their babies up for adoption and be done with it. While fathers have to pay child support if they're not in their child's life. I most definitely think fathers should have more of a say than they do as far as their child's life. Yes, the mother carried the baby but it is just as much the father's child as the mother's. They should have the same rights to their child and their decision regarding the child. They should absolutely have a say in regards to aborting the baby, but I feel if it puts the mother at risk or anything medical or health related that could happen to her, I believe she should have the final say because it directly affects her body. But the father should, of course, have a say in the matter.
ReplyDeleteThis topic pertaining to the rights of the father in pregnancy seems to be rather controversial. First and foremost, I do not believe that a father can legitimately be "forced" into a pregnancy. Agreeing with Lloyd's previous statement, if a couple or two individuals choose to engage in unprotected sex, they are both equally accountable for their actions and equally have to deal with the consequences. Not one individual is more responsible than the other. Unless for some strange reason a woman lied about being on some form of birth control and the father did not know would lead to some controversy, but then again if a father was not ready to deal with the consequences he should not be having sex. I also find it justifiable for women to be able to surrender their rights for their children for adoption, but males should have the equal right to do so as well. The couple absolutely should come to a consensus on what they want to do with the child. If a consensus is not met though, I feel as though the father definitely should pay the child support money if the mother chooses to keep the baby, because they were BOTH responsible for the baby being conceived.
ReplyDeleteI don't believe a man can be forced into parenthood but I do believe that he can be tricked into parenthood. This is nothing new because women have been tricking men and getting pregnant for eons. Most of the time women do it for the money or to just keep the man their with because of some monetary reason. When it all comes down to it you can't force a man to be a father you can however force him to support the child. Just because someone gives you money once a week doesn't make the emotional bond between child and parent. So in retrospect you can trick a man into being a father but emotionally only he can make himself a father. On the subject of a man having a say to their child's life, I belief a man has no right to tell a woman what she can and can not do with her own body. If she accidentally gets pregnant or she herself is tricked into pregnancy, if she doesn't want the baby she shouldn't be forced into having it. If the woman decides to have the baby and the father is a positive influence in the child's life and the child wants him to be part of his or her life then he should have the right to be.
ReplyDeleteWomen are the ones who go through all of the physical aspects of pregnancy but that doesn't make the child any less the dad's than it is the mother's. I don't think that it is right at all that the father doesn't have a say whether to put a child up for adoption or not. I believe it should be a joint agreement and not have too much power to either the mother or father. I know many men have left women when they find out that they are pregnant but that does not mean that all men should be punished. They should still be able to make decisions in their child's life. I also believe there should be a statute of time because in a lot of cases where a woman doesn't tell the father about the pregnancy initially but later do, they are only looking to use them for money. They are doing just that, using the man only for their money. These men are not fathers to the children and can't be because the mothers made the decision to leave them out of their children's lives for too long. These fathers that are not informed of their children's births so they never have a chance to be a real father to these kids. These father's are definitely forced into parenthood with very little hope of being a successful parent. I agree with Matt in that I think that the mother should not be the sole person to decide on if to have an abortion or not. If the mother does not think she can raise the child but the father does, then permission for an abortion should not be given because that child still has a parent willing to care for him or her.
ReplyDelete1. I don't feel that men can be forced into parenthood. I mean both the man and woman are at fault for the pregnancy itself. Both the man and woman made the decision to have a sexual relationship knowing that eventually or that one time that there was a possibility of pregnancy. It's sad to know that many people willing to blame there own child on the other parent or contributing factors. I think women deserve child support if the father is not arround because he's in most ways responsible for the pregnancy. 3. I do believe that there should be a deadline of when the father should know about the baby. If a woman chooses not to tell the father about their baby that she doesnt really deserve to get any form of child support down the road because thats showing that she wants nothing to do with the father. It's hard to think that someone would want to keep such a thing for the child's father. I understand if the mother is unsure of who the father of her baby is and cant get in-touch with all her partners to get a paternity test done, then she should not be penalized by lack of child support.
ReplyDeleteThis is a very difficult issue in society and my best friend is going through it right now. Her parents have been divorced and her and her brother live with her mom. Just last week, when her parents went to court again, her father wrote something like he didn't want to be their father anymore. In her words, he "disowned" her. We think this may be because he does not want to pay child support anymore. I don't agree that fathers should ever be allowed to deny rights to their children. It their child to, wether they wanted it to be or not, and they have just as much responsibility in taking care of it than the mother. I also think that fathers should have a right in the say of their child's life. Even though the woman is the one carrying the baby, they should be able to say if they want to raise it or not. It is a tough decision because it is the women's body, but the man helped to create it.
ReplyDeleteThe idea that a father can be "forced" into fatherhood does not make a whole lot of sense to me. A man can choose whether or not they have sex with a woman and they can choose whether or not they use protection to prevent having a child. With this in mind child support is absolutely necessary. Any man with a functioning reproductive system can have a child. However being a father is a much more complicated task. Being a father entails being a role model, a teacher, and supporting children emotionally, psychologically and economically. Fathers have certain responsibilities and child support is absolutely part of this responsibility.
ReplyDeleteThere have been issues raised about man's rights when it comes to adoption, abortion, and choosing whether to be a part of a child's life. I am all for equal rights, but I do not believe in a man's right to make decisions about abortion or adoption. This probably seems contradictory and unfair but frankly the process of birth and raising a child is inherently unfair. Just look at the statistics, 80% of single parents are women. Not only that a woman has to carry a baby for 9 months, and go through a painful delivery, a man only has to have sex. Taking this into consideration a women should absolutely get the right to have the last say in decisions about her child. To start she is far more likely to raise the child and it is her body there for her right to decide about having the child.
The last thing I want to touch is the idea that a man should have the right to decide whether or not they want to be a part of a child's life. A man needs to be held responsible, one night can lead to a completely different life for a women. At the very minimum men must have to pay child support. Child support will at least make it feasible for the mother and the child to live a sustainable life. However it is impossible to force a man to be a father and it would be a detriment to mother and the child to try.